September 5, 2023
Dear Pebble$,
30 days gives you enough time to dig a hole so deep you sink as the earth moves into heaps on either side. It is water, deep enough to swim from the tears you cried. Silence. Self-annihilation. Stupid talk rolled off a beautiful tongue without pauses. Flashbacks to a time when your face was an invitation to bullying. A time when the light in your eyes was offensive.
30 days is enough time to bury nothing in that hole, to place the earth back where you found it. To rise higher as the soil fits into the spaces beneath your feet. It is enough time to cry at the thought of all the good that happened while you were distracted by the stupid talk that rolled off a beautiful tongue without pauses. Probably, enough time to read the power of words in a book and exchange silence for the sound of your voice. Enough time to be your hype woman as self-annihilating letters to self, move from the outbox to trash. I'll call you back to the present, the here and now of views through windows that remind you - there is no place you would rather be.
Girl, you have so much ahead of you. These distractions ended at the hour that Day 30 said Hey. Pour back into yourself. It's time to rise up again to pour further, quicker, and deeper than ever before. There are more lives this time. When you walk out into the light on Day 30, don't let a number, response, assumption, failure or thought stop you from pouring.
Your desired reality is already your present. Claim it! Work it! Live it!
One more reason for pouring back into yourself. Preparation. Where you're going and where you will be required - the scared don't go there. Doubt is an old promise on a record we accidentally broke during the 30 days. It's time to pack some new things and choose some replacements.
It's time to walk across that leveled earth and claim yourself as whole where holes have been. Pour water into the soil, let your seeds find their way to the surface, break through and create strength to hold some fruit.
"Walk across that leveled earth."
