Tuesday, December 11, 2018

No. 5 Grandmother

This quarter's guest blog post comes from Minney Richani, who speaks on  FAITH & VALUE  which is a poetry piece that opens up about age, wisdom and experience. Come look through the lens at the wrinkles of a grandmother straightening out mistakes not to be repeated.

One two three
Who am I speaking as
Having it all and sipping it down slowly
I'm only one gulp in and it's been an hour
Making others feel responsible for happiness
And I'm laughing I'm laughing
Number four not including me
The fourth living generation from the top
"The screen is too small I can't see it"
And technology is too large it blinds you
Expanded minds reduced to..

Courtesy of  © 2016 minney richani

Tuesday, October 2, 2018

Dear Pebble$: 003

October 2, 2018

Dear Pebble$, 

Welcome to the final quarter of 2018, you have completed 75.3% of the year.

" I realize that I can no longer allow life dictate how I feel, how I react and how I get back up from being knocked down."

Your resilience is the secret to becoming the great woman you wish to be, you are bigger than your current hurdles and you know that life was won so you could restart. You have to act like God's child do not wait on a next year to walk in greater things, a new month is here this is your next moment in time. In Him, know your rights, your entitlements, the impossibilities turned into possibilities. Know that prayer is cool, but your prayers from now on are directed to the next phase. Your new phase is here and it is ready - with all needs met just ACCESS it.

What you have prayed for is here, walk in the reality of claiming and being what it is that you wanted for so long. Do not beg for what already has your name on it, do not question what your faith has already cashed in. The next step is preparing all this content you've placed on a list to film, to write, to plan, to create etc. etc. Your audience is watching, waiting and growing - girl you have a lot to give don't be afraid. Stop crying.

You have a lot to be grateful, you know about September 6, 2018. That is your reminder for the rest of your life, it could have ended BUT God and his receipts though! Be grateful more often, acknowledge what IS going right, what you HAVE achieved, where you HAVE been. You have grown since Letter 001, you have progressed, you are not at the same place you were then.

Since Letter 002, every point is a work in progress but I feel they collectively combine to nurture you into the woman you are becoming. They each stand as weakness that are shared, so you can increase in strength. They are character builders, things that will make you relatable to those who are yet to work on these things for themselves.

This next quarter is for starting afresh, for opening yourself to possibilities and not stepping back even once because you don't feel like you qualify. What you think disqualifies you is what will qualify you, for folks wanting to give you a chance at whatever it is that you want to do. The next quarter is for allocating time to planning. Let's go.

Much Love, 

The Chica You Best Believe That!

Letter 002

Copyright © 2018 PebblesWroteIt

Tuesday, September 18, 2018

By Your Standard

This quarter's guest blog post comes from ermRepublic, who speaks on CHALLLENGES expressed in the beautiful form of a poem. Feel the words, walk through the internal conversation and often conflict that occurs in the seasons of this journey called life.

and sometimes it feels like you are the only one
breathing alive
amidst sleeping beauties and charming princes
dreaming through a fabricated life
imbibing empty narratives...
like you are desperately doing your best to stay woke and real,
in touch with the visceral needs of your soul,
your pangs of reluctance and the spasms of desire
while the world yet unceasingly tugs at you...

Courtesy of  © 2017  ermRepublic

Tuesday, August 21, 2018

My 10 Word Story

The image above is from last year at a time when racial tensions were put as a reminder on our news stations, in our feeds, it's always been there. Anybody that says it phased out is deceiving themselves, for deaths to make it to TV now, this can't be the beginning it was just too apparent to file as a report in some police station and stay hidden under lock and key. And I hope you know it is still happening, and no not all those incidents will make the news. Families will continually fight, communities will continually plea for the blood of its children to be redeemed. A year later I wanted to take you through the thoughts of this photo and my 10 word story. My #10wordstory is on Instagram, if you would like to read it. I'm trying to go through what exactly I was thinking of when writing this 10-word story and what really lies behind these 10 words besides a powerful photo.

When you're a writer it is easier to make an attempt to write some words down to ease situations, to put something visible to how you internally feel and in some instances to help you keep a balance mentally. All these images, footage, stories, officers not being given their due punishment and the constant demonizing of those killed is a lot to process. Just a while back the very district attorney that decided not to charge the policeman responsible for Mike Brown's death, was up for re-election in St. Louis. If this doesn't raise question to who exactly we give authority to and what that does when it travels heavy-footed down the system, then I'm not sure what else to say. The assumption that something must have been done to provoke a situation, rather than facing that some 'human beings' are just purely evil and haven't woken up to the current climate of unavoidable diversity. I love diversity, I love communities where everybody doesn't look the same but I love communities where everybody has something that connects them whether culturally, ethnically or on the basis of cuisine.. because who doesn't love good food.

I love diversity because it constantly reminds me that there is more to life than one form of a pretty picture. As I reflect on the pretty picture and pictures, I remember that the canvas that holds the entire human race cannot claim it is complete when we look to the erasure of some. A birth is an addition to this canvas, a new hue to awaken the life that it already there but a death, that is the sudden disappearance of a masterpiece that was in progress and never quite got finished. When our faces have not finished their purpose on that canvas, bullet wounds are what is left in its place. A piercing, gaping hole that no fabric can replace or mend. 

It's bad enough facing the constant profiling, frisking, emasculation and often dehumanization that history has successfully repeated and projected on melanated people, on minorities, on the ever persistent fighters who challenge statistics, rise above and are still pushed into a box or rabbit hole of some sort. 

I'm no expert, I'm no activist because boy do they suffer from all the fighting and advocating; but I believe experience and the reality of many situations qualifies me to have a voice. Asks of me to speak on what I do know so I can be educated on what I don't know, to stop shielding myself from the call to rise above all that I've been told to be and wake up to what I am purposed to be. 

I can go on sharing and exploring and explaining, but let's get onto these 10 words behind the powerful picture.

1. I'd - I would, if I could..
If I could close my mouth, if I could stop voicing my concerns, if I could stop seeing these images, if I could stop experiencing these fears, if I could stop talking, if I could silence every unqualified individual who only sees a race card being played instead of seeing a real problem. If only I could, I wouldn't. I am two parts fighter, one third outnumbered.. I don't think I have any other choice, I know I don't have any other choice but to fight in love and put that love in the atmosphere while I ponder, internalize and react to this hate.

2. Ask - this denotes that permission is required first, but is it really, do I really need it before I can speak. Ask denotes that I need approval to proceed with where I am headed to next. It requires of me to sort this out by myself but is all of a sudden a helping hand when I do things against an expected plan, a plan that didn't expect me to take the decisions I have taken. Spoken words that were too strong a concoction to swallow as whole truth. It tells me to wait on permission while others assume right to exclude what I think, or how I might feel. It asks of me without expecting me to ask questions right back.

3. For - for what reason, and for what is it that I ask, for whom? For who am I supposed to keep quiet, stop feeling, stop being. I ask for whom. Whom must I surrender my struggles to.. not as a trade for peace and respect or restored worth but for more worry, fear, displaced identity and continual target. If the reason isn't for me, where me is everything that is right and needed here, then what does your input matter.

4. A - I am giving possession to something. A boy, a girl, a seat at this table.. what? I am giving possession to all the consequences that come with taking everything internalized, thought about and seen, and I am vomiting it up so it doesn't weaken me. I cut the things that drain energy, make me useless for battle to awaken the things that will provide me with help. The possession is help and I wish to share it with those who need it through listening ears, open hearts and a spirit that discerns when war is necessary and where to apply subtle moves of moving past traps set to trigger emotions.

5. Lighter - is this burden too hard for you ma'am, will anybody help you.. a supposed dent on my character. If the mud is on your face and the dirt clothing you from head to toe and I mock you, will you stop doing the things that I punish you for ?  Will you stop talking, will I have succeeded in depleting your rights ?  And while you're down there, take a good look at my shoes. I don't mind looking at shoes not far from a face that could be kicked in, I don't mind doing anything that continually exposes how corrupt you are as a 'cop', a 'judge'  and 'anybody else'.

6. Sentence - this could be a grammatical construction, but it's served time.. a period where I am in confinement.. whether solely to rip my mind from me or hope that I won't remember how to fight after I give this time out of my life.

7. But - is this to state my pause, a hesitation, a break taken to continue

8. I'm - I am, bringing this back to me.

9. Not - no going back, did I stutter? No negotiation, the fair grounds are gone.

10. Sorry - does this call for apologies, stating that I am wrong, is this something to be sorry about. I am sitting alone at a table I can't engage with another mind so I engage mine, do you now find a problem with it ?  Is it ok for me to sit alone AND be comfortable while you sit uncomfortably shifting the padding in your butt looking at the place you placed me, with the intent to tie me to misery and have me sit in it.

My caption is a reflection of what goes on when all of this is absorbed, when all of this is endured, when we have to grow generation after generation hoping that the previous generation healed so we would have a greater strength to move forward with. So, we would have greater wisdom to walk in and develop. We hope that we are not stereotypically birthed, racially graded and sectioned according to surface knowledge held of us. When I smile outside and keep it moving, I am crying, reporting you to God and praying behind closed doors. My prayers and reports may seem to amount to nothing but there is one judgement that no officer, no attorney and no judge can escape and that is the FINAL judgement given by God. My friend on instagram, wrote a poem and a prayer that expresses these thoughts exactly and beautifully, read it here.

Remain Blessed.


    Copyright © 2018 PebblesWroteIt

Tuesday, August 7, 2018

Always A New Beginning

This post is inspired by the thought of being in the company of somebody who has a terminal illness and you are an expectant mother spending time with this person. So, it was a case of thinking about how this situation could depress a person. The depression being placed in the actual thought that, the expectant mother talks about her new beginning with this growing fetus safely incubating inside with no care for this world's problems while a terminal illness contrasts this with its own limitations. The expectant mother encourages the terminally ill, "yes this is a new beginning for me but I want you to understand that in the midst of current limitations, what's ahead of you or even in your journey is beyond today. It holds new beginnings for you too". 

You are always experiencing a new beginning, there is always a new beginning in your life. That new beginning is each new minute that you witness, it's each new hour that you survive to see. It's each new day that you get to see, it's each new week that you have the privilege to start and finish. So whether you feel like your time is coming to an end soon what you need to do, is make sure you are somebody else's new beginning. Reach out to somebody let that be the new beginning of a relationship, the new beginning of a conversation. Whether that conversation between you and person B only takes place once in a lifetime - it still has value, that was a new beginning and a new chance that they were able to take in conversation with you. They knew of your existence through that, they were able to express that through talking with you, through relating with you, with spending time in your presence and you spending time in theirs.

As much as you are a new beginning for a person, that person is also a new beginning for you.. a new beginning for talking current affairs, a new beginning of sharing poetry, a new beginning of expressing such passion in something you share like you've never seen in your life before. 

Always A New Beginning for you should mean that no matter what, no matter what has come before you, you decide and I repeat you decide what comes after those moments. You decide what the end looks like - I'm not going to go out like a punk, I'm not going out easy and I'm not going down easy. You ever seen a lion get in a fight with something like a buffalo and be like "this thing is like two times my weight, man I better back up" No! that lion is going for that buffalo's neck, he does not give a damn if that animal is two times his weight or if he can handle it or not. The lion is hungry, it will and must feed its hunger. You are that lion, in life you have to feed your hunger of wanting to live, of wanting to see more moments. You have to feed your hunger of wanting to learn new things, wanting to meet new people, wanting to learn new lessons. Your hunger will bring you to the knowledge of new opportunities, you will hunger within these new opportunities and each day will bring a new hunger. Allow that to drive you, the hunger for your new days, your new minutes, your hours, your new weeks, your new months and your future years.

Instead of putting together new year's resolutions which you might just write for the sake of "Oh it's a new year I got to see" maybe make a vision board just 5 images and each of them should represent a new beginning you want. I don't know, it might be your new beginning on what it feels like to grow and what type of content you put out for 500 followers compared to the 50 you had before. That new beginning might be taking the chance to pick up a class in something that interests you but you probably wouldn't necessarily do as your main job. It might be art, photography, baking or being an instructor of something you love. Your new goal may be to understand the art of photography, understand why folks love photography so much and what would make you love photography more. Now that photography could make you some money if you get into the company of the right kind of people, not only will you gain a new skill but you might create a new avenue of revenue for yourself. 

Amongst the five things you could add to that vision board is something that builds the community around you, it could be 'I'm going to try calling at least one friend a week just to ask them how they are doing' and 'make sure at least four times a year I'm in contact with everybody I claim that I love and I care for'.  With time you create a new beginning for yourself that looks beyond me, me, me! Your life shows that 'no matter what comes tomorrow I'm ready to still somehow do for myself and do for others' and, when I am not in the position to do so hopefully I would have inspired others to reach out to people in their communities.

Coming back to the inspiration for this post...
So despite the new life brewing within a mother when you see what seems like a dead situation, always remember that there is always a new beginning. Always. There will always be a new beginning for you and you don't have to sweat that, you don't need anybody to come and poison your field. If you see that new beginning, if you hunger for that next moment you will see it. Like I said in my piece "Realz" you only die when you allow yourself to let yourself go. 

Think about it, if the mother decides to never let herself go in a health sense, she ensures that she eats well, she hydrates herself, she attends her appointments and she raises her concerns. Then she can never really jeopardize the life of her unborn child. In the instance that she decides the pain is too much, or she reaches a point of severe fatigue and wants no part in carrying on, letting go of that child may go through a process that puts her life at risk. A mother who pulls through deciding that she wants to see the fruits of her labor will be able to enjoy the reality of a baby in her arms, the new beginning of a journey in motherhood. How much labor will we go through in life unsure of what the fruits look like? but let our encouragement be that each time we could have stopped, we started something new.

No matter what it is you face in life you will always see that new beginning - just hunger for it. In your birthing season and 
the times of facing a seemingly dead situation.  Just hunger for it ! 

  Copyright © 2018 PebblesWroteIt

Tuesday, July 24, 2018

The Graveyard: Richest Reserve

"Don't die with your gifts inside of you."

" Forget Saudi Arabia, for rich reserves of oil or Sierra Leone for its diamonds and other nations for their precious treasures. The graveyard is filled with treasures that can't be retrieved, it is filled with people who died with their gifts, who did not get the chance to empty themselves into life and people who refused to believe that certain opportunities were theirs to use those gifts for. "

Do not miss out on using the tools in your hands and your journey to impact your world and drive the changes attached to your existence.

Don't allow yourself to be the servant that goes home to your heavenly father and he ends up cursing you out because you had a whole lot of gifts and you never used them. Don't allow yourself to be the servant that suffered on earth and goes back home to suffer from the pain and anguish of your father who placed so much in you and just wanted you to believe that he could use you. Do not be the servant that goes back home and acts a fool when the Lord asks you what you did on earth and you state what you did for yourself and your little inner circle. 

It is about us going to our graves empty, many of us do not achieve the greatness that we are meant to achieve because we are so afraid. It's alright I have been in that position, I have been in that moment but when I watched a video which played out a man's life I had to get my life together. In the time spent watching that video I made up my mind - this book will get published, these solutions I want to find in the world oh for sure I will find ways to make it happen. God will not give me solutions to improve people's lives, he won't give me a book that can touch people's lives and I'm going to sit here like "No publishing house wants to pick me" nope siree let me use myself as an example if that helps. If nobody will help you, help yourself ! 

Call God on that matter, He always has resources.. you might have to be patient but trust me He will work it out some way. Imagine if you die with a cure, the potential was in you to provide a cure and you die that means, that because it died with you people are going to die after you with no hope. The hope that there was passed away and in that case people's blood will be on your hands. You can imagine how infectious some disease are that require a cure, sometimes it's something so simple but all those people will die because it was on you to bring that solution to the world. It was on you to patent those ideas, it was on you to save those peoples lives and your scared little behind decided not to. You better watch yourself in this life and it might not seem like something of greatness but imagine if your purpose causes you to question "Lord why is it that when I have the boldness to speak to somebody on public transit who looks a little downcast, a little disappointed, sad that I end up impacting their life, what am I the transit minister" then that right there is enough. You can joke with God have your laughter with Him but be serious about your gift, be serious about the way you are able to reach out to somebody. You might be the public transit counselor of earth, you might not get famous but trust me YOU remain in the hearts of those you had the boldness to impact, those you had the boldness to ask "are you alright today?", those who you were bold enough to speak to. Those who you are bold enough to say "pour your heart out and let me listen", do not go to your grave with such packages in your hands. You are never out of service, even in your weakest moments. Remember that!

It does not matter if you think something is your purpose and you go trying it and it doesn't work out, you know why? because you STILL tried you are better than the man who NEVER tried and didn't find out. Try things in life do not be limited by your human capabilities behave like you're superhuman because you know what.. YOU ARE ! You are the intricate design that makes up the unit, that completes the person known as You. It is so deep within you that you just have to search and learn to love yourself, to continually empower yourself in order that you might reach out and impact others. Sometimes the greatest impact we make on a person is just to say hello and smile, that's it. It might be to read them a story, read them a piece of poetry, read them a quote or smile. Smiling is the most universal language, it does not have language barriers.. you don't need to be literate in Chinese to smile at a Chinese person for them to understand, you don't need to know how to speak Swahili for a smile to translate. It doesn't matter what language or location just give their grumpy self a smile, give people something to smile about. 

That is all I wanted to say, 
Peace ! 

"Don't be lazy to achieve because of the time it will take, how hard the journey will be, what folks might say, who will leave you and who won't understand you."  

Copyright © 2018 PebblesWroteIt

Tuesday, July 10, 2018

Stirring Trials Like Bingo.

Why do great people always go through so much, why have they had it hard when they narrate or share their stories?

There is no testimony without a test, if you have not been faced with overcoming trials and mountains how can you call yourself an overcomer. If you haven't gone through a fight how can you claim fighter status. If there was no battle for you to win how can you claim winner in the field of life.

Once you've asked God to use you or stated your dreams to him and how you want to achieve them according to your given purpose. He hears your request and grants access to a journey used to refine you and prepare you for that place in the seasons of your journey with Him through life. It's as if He starts stirring up the storm, I liken it to Bingo. He keeps turning that handle until a bingo ball is chosen, you use your bingo marker to highlight all the numbers that come which are on your board. All five numbers that he chooses are on your bingo board so it's time for the test and the trials.

This is the point where you decide to fight or flee, sit in doubt or lift your behind and do what is necessary to claim your prize. Overcome the inner battle and push forth with your decisions, no turning back.

If you don't want to identify and stir up the gifts within yourself. If you don't want to achieve in life there are no problems for you to face, don't worry ain't nobody checkin for you BUT 🎶 if you wanna be somebody and you want to go somewhere you got to wake up and pay attention 🎶. Let God stir up those trials like bingo so you can overcome and win the prize, allow yourself to cast doubts and do what is necessary to fight your fights and win your battles. Overcome the test to get to your testimony, cut off anything that doesn't allow you to equip yourself and move forth in learning your newest tool. You will be fine, your guardian is never caught unaware.

In these seasons, in these trials hold off on man's strength and hold onto God's strength. Focus not on the problem, but He that is able to solve the problem. Be reminded that those who stay at home, have a zero chance of winning the bingo game. Those who are observers during bingo night with no board have a zero chance of winning, those who had boards, joined in and listened out for the numbers have a chance. Which one are you? 

You have to participate to get help, you have to be willing to find the will needed to face the trials and navigate its assault course like a bingo game. Waiting, expectant, ready, actively doing something. Dear readers, friends, overcomers I leave you on this note. You will stir trials like bingo and the prize is yours to win, participate in actively doing something.

You can also find me herehere & here.

Copyright © 2018 PebblesWroteIt