Tuesday, May 26, 2020

Speak To Me But Know It's Him

My journey through life is not as a perfect child BUT as a learning child. The things that proceed out of my mouth or through a tweet, even this blog are not the product of me but of a father who continually feeds my spirit and hunger to be greater, to be more useful to my generation and my world.

I am being shaped daily, to discover my eventual form as purpose has set this course of my life which extends with each new day. I am first an open heart, open ears, and enriched mind before any opinion, advice or words proceed out of my mouth. This is something I continually remind myself of, when I am given the privilege to see the deepest parts of a person through emotions laid out and their truths finally spoken.

As I remember this and work on being a better listener, my response to your problems, challenges, and questions is years of asking for the tools that are necessary for me to truly be of use to the world around me. All I have known, challenged, understood, and grown with is a God who has made absolute sense out of nonsense. A friend who has acted as a guide, who has continually pushed me in the direction where the lessons I needed were located.

My path has crossed with those who have added quality to my experience both good and bad, people who have in one way or another equipped me with learning and facing the diversity that exists within my community. My community remains the same but is ever-changing.


Yo! Poet-Writer girl behind the screen, please break that down.

What do you mean the 'same but ever-changing' ?


The purpose and the work that I must contribute to in my community remains the same. I will always have my part to play with the gifts I have been given to me to use, BUT the demographic, the people that make up that community will change with each stage and each need that arises in that community.

You are my community, an audience who read my work for an experience. Some of you have read all of my blog posts while some of you met me 2 or 3 posts ago or even TODAY. You are the ones I speak for, continually write to, and keep writing for. Leaving a comment under this post today, requesting that I address a topic or write a poem on a topic, would present a need. A need that I would need to address with whatever tools I have available and provide some solutions.

Through this desire and drive to attend to you as my community, I can share an encouraging message and even make you laugh. I am only doing the work that a guided child would do.

People may seek help from you or me as His child and sometimes we will have to relate how we feel about that to them. You let them know that the void they seek to fill, the answers they are searching for, need to be solved by going to God himself so they can gain that strength for themselves.

When you rely too heavily on people and forget who really deserves all the kudos, you often realize the hard way that reliance on another person doesn't bring total reassurance.

Build relationships YES,
Learn from others YES,
Connect with others in your times of need YES 
Connect with others in your times of strength YES 

But do not make them your whole support system, instead make yourself part of that system.


Copyright © 2020 PebblesWroteIt

Tuesday, February 4, 2020

Between Bowling Pins

Blog post formerly titled "In The Kiddie Pool" until I left it too long and forgot where it was supposed to go. Why is Pebble$ being honest with you? because most writers would be ashamed to tell you this and having a title without the concept is real. Having a concept without a title is also a real writer's problem. Nobody tells you that writing it down and making it plain means that your draft will contain some good pieces that will help you form the new thing that WASN'T the original thing. Because it is ok to not have the full picture; because being a writer is a beautiful journey that sometimes looks like chaos but comes together when you have patience.


The new title will make sense as we progress just stay with me. The pins will line up and you too will be that bowling ball.

So picture yourself in a bowling alley from this point forward. Are you there? Good, all the props you need to imagine what I am saying are in that bowling alley.

When you go bowling you don't pick up all the balls and just roll them down the alley assigning each ball to a pin. That's not how the game works it takes one ball at a time hoping that you knock the pins out with that one ball. You don't just throw the ball either right? You try to get some direction, a focus point and power in that final release from your arm.

There are several bowling balls but only one ball will knock the pins down at a time.

As a Christian there can be many of us in one building but one is chosen to shake the whole building not even a department.

All the balls can be present but only one, will be the final one held in the hand of the winner.

If I told you that one pin placed where the balling ball would be on the ground could knock out the other pins aligned at the back of the alley, you would think that I was crazy right?

But if that one pin was thrown with Serena speed, strength & precision, it's possible.

back to the bowling ball in place of that pin

That bowling ball holds power. The bowling ball represents the power & increased surface area that leads to impact when we have God with us.

God changes our lone pin, that lone pin crazy enough to think it can hit all those pins at the back of the alley. He changes that lone pin to a bowling ball when he has our back. All of a sudden crazy isn't so crazy any more when power and precision are added.

When you are convinced that you have 'thee*  bowling bowl',  you realize that not all balls are needed for each pin at the back of the alley.
*not a typo, I meant what I wrote

but rather one is enough when trying to knock all of them out.

You can be the one he uses as an individual to reach the many. He can use you to be more effective than 5-10 people put together. You can be the ball between pins, that knows what being a pin is like - knowing where the days drag, when failures hurt and when a new year or season doesn't seem like anything worth getting hyped over.

Can you see the reality of yourself as that pin? No? 

You can't see it, because you won't see it.  Whatever may come your way in life is overcome when you believe that your part of the work is not more than you can bear. When you stop seeing yourself as only that 'bowling pin' and remember that you have access to thee bowling ball you can move into this reality.

Seeing is believing doesn't work here. Seeing the trial as bigger than yourself won't help you here. Allowing yourself to be swallowed by life, ends with the carcass of your confidence being spat out around here. It's better to let yourself  be used for good around here. It is better to step out alone and hold onto yours when everybody wants to deny what got them here. 

It is better to work on the department than be overwhelmed by the whole building. You can't imagine how the word gets round when you appreciate your pin state and maximize every inch of who you are. Please be encouraged that you wouldn't be here if you didn't have anything to give to the community around you.

Being that crazy pin isn't the end to your impact, stretch out and grab hold of the power and precision in close access. Let the bowling ball transform you.

                                                                     Copyright © 2020 PebblesWroteIt

Wednesday, January 22, 2020

Delayed, But Never Too Late

This quarter's guest blog post comes from HoneyLuxe, who speaks on  BE PATIENT & DO SOMETHING  with a post that encourages you to step back from what you haven't achieved and look forward to what this new season of life holds for you. If you will maximize the new decade you must understand that some things have a right time, a specific time  -  prepare yourself in the meantime.

I remember being in my teens and envisioning what my life would be like in ten years time. I was certain I would be
married, living in a fancy mansion with my amazing career and raising at least two children by the time I was twenty five. Crazy right?

Well, that definitely has not happened yet and I can only laugh about it now! I was so sure that all will work out accordingly within the time I predicted because, well why not? Fast forward to now. I know that it is only Christ who can dictate
how my life will pan out! One of my favourite scriptures is Jeremiah 29:11. He knows the true meaning to my life
and it is not for me to attempt to decide it for myself.

When you hear purpose, what comes to your mind? A gift that you may have? Maybe a goal you have been trying to accomplish? Or is it about a strong passion you have for something?

There are so many def..

Courtesy of © 2019 Honey Luxe

Tuesday, December 24, 2019

2019 Reads : Pebble$

This year I borrowed from my community be that friends, libraries or exchanges with other readers. I saved
a lot of coins by looking for books I wanted in libraries or asking other folks who had already
purchased those books.

1. Wanting A God You Can Talk To  :  Jesse Duplantis

2. Praying To Get Results  :  Kenneth E. Hagin

3. The Midas Touch - A Balanced Approach To Biblical Prosperity  :  Kenneth E. Hagin

4. The Screwtape Letters - Letters From A Senior To A Junior Devil  :  C. S. Lewis

5. The Diary of  A Nobody  :  George & Weedon Grossmith

6. A Town Like Alice  :  Nevil Shute

7. No Disrespect  :  Sister Souljah

8. The Grapes Of Wrath  :  John Steinbeck

9. The Poet  X  :  Elizabeth Acevedo

10. Pioneers Or Settlers?  :  Philip Mohabir

11. Their Eyes Were Watching God  :  Zora Neale Hurston

12. The Pilgrim's Progress  :  John Bunyan

13. The Color Purple  :  Alice Walker

14. The Image Of God In You  :  Kenneth Copeland

15. Thank You, Mr Falker  :  Patricia Polacco  (read by Jane Kaczmarek)

16. I  Am  Nobody's  Nigger  :  Dean Atta

17. Hard Times  :  Charles Dickens

18. Rebound  :  Kwame Alexander

19. The Avengers - The Greatest Heroes  :  Alistair Dougall

20. Reflections 1  :  Dolapo Adelakun

21. Hold  :  Michael Donkor

22. In Pieces  :  Sally Field

23. Poems By The Way & Love Is Enough  :  William Morris

24. Assata - An Autobiography  :  Assata Shakur

25. The Creative Edge  :  Matthew Ashimolowo

26. A Month In The Country  :  J. L. Carr

27. Monkeys With Typewriters - How To Write Fiction And Unlock The Secret Power Of Stories  :  Scarlett Thomas

28. Long Way Down  :  Jason Reynolds

29. Washington Black  :  Esi Edugyan

30. A Bad Case Of Stripes  :  David Shannon  (read by Sean Astin)

31. The Road Less Travelled  :  M. Scott Peck

32. Sweet Thing  :  Magda Ayuk

33. Stellaluna  :  Janell Cannon  (read by Pamela Reed)

34. 12 Rules For Life - An Antidote For Chaos  :  Jordan B Peterson

35. The Prophet  :  Khalil Gibran

36.  Apex  :  Ramez Naam

37.  Eleanor Oliphant Is Completely Fine  :  Gail Honeyman

38. 12 Crimes You Commit Against Yourself  :  Dolapo Adelakun

39. Chicken Sunday  :  Patricia Polacco

40. In Other Words  :  Jhumpa Lahiri

41. Sophie's Masterpiece  :  Eileen Spinelli  (read by CCH Pounder)

Copyright © 2019 PebblesWroteIt

Tuesday, July 30, 2019

Bullet Hole Roses

This  quarter's  guest blog post comes from Aesthetica Poetica who speaks on  SPEAK  YOUR  HEART  which looks
at  feelings through one  of  her poems on the death of  innocence and  lives cut short.

Joyful lives shattered to smithereens
Minds traumatised by deafening screams 
Innocence robbed... unrequited dreams 

Tattooed nightmares; blood stained hearts and minds
Blindfolded through fear by humankind
Our lurking enemy... undefined 

Yet out of bullet holes roses grow
Selfless acts of kindness, freely shown

Courtesy of © 2015  Debbie Razey

Tuesday, June 11, 2019

#RepresentCollective: Are You Strong?

Image source   :   Alvin Ailey American Dance Theater

From him comes the strength
Of all that man has ever envisioned and more
From him comes knowledge.
A hunger that grows and a brain that feeds constantly.
From him comes the bond of brothers,
Boldness of enterprise
It's in his eyes I find determination.
Yes he is strong,
Muscle like hams, glutes & traps can show you his physical attributes
Possibly make it clearer to see all that he can hold.
As for those things he is more silent about,
There lies his truth
His true strength.
When he is busy working without knowing it,
Speaking life without even knowing.
Stretching himself for his own benefit,
Because what he does for himself is for everyone's benefit.
His strength is in how useful he is
It is in the heights he will reach.
He is the strength of brotherhood that devours books,
Grasps and shares knowledge..
He is the art of ballet.
A bared body to show the nudity of his strength when it is needed most,
Dignified all at times because it is necessary at all times.
He is the bare body of work within trials played back for you to see,
Mountains that have proudly etched his name.
Lands that keep his name in the sand,
Emboss his footsteps in its earth.
He is a son that matters,
A man that should be minded,
A force to acknowledge.
Not worth castrating or hanging
Not worth silencing or losing

I'm looking for representation of men that look like my father -
Men who stayed,
Men who caused problems &
The same ones who solved them.
Men that caused riots,
Used lives to make change,
Men who took and take dangerous risks.
Men we will hate,
Agree to disagree with,
Men who must find peace.
Representation is a man who needs to unearth his wrongs
And speak when he is ready,
His strength bound in being real with himself and others.
I measure his strength by his heart,
You are weak as you weaken your heart
But strong as you know how to take care of that organ
That issues the up and downs of life.
How will my men handle it?
Remove pitchfork,
My men have no reason to be burnt at any stake,
Carried away from home or their minds.
DO not question mental to insult or disregard,
Ask because you really need to.
Ask because you see a need too.

Copyright © 2018 PebblesWroteIt

Wednesday, May 29, 2019

A Personal Essay: A Bar Set High

Photography :  EyeOfLeke

My circumstance isn't special. I am just silent where others seek to find their voices.

I love the attainment of a place on a bar set so high they don't expect you to reach it. Reaching that bar is never about them, it should be about you. Anytime I have done anything for someone else I didn't enjoy the achievement. Let's just say I caught onto God's plan. I realized hoping someone else would face regrets while you celebrate isn't a mindset of the high achiever. Rather we attain heights to break the bars and keep that ride pushing.

As I attain those heights and keep that ride pushing I notice there's a kind of growth that will always come alongside peace. That peace comes with a youthfulness which causes others to question age and achievement. Being inquisitive will get you there, seeking continual improvement will get you there. Give people no power to emotionally control you and you are partly on your way there, openly reflect on how you approach conversations, requests and whatever challenges come to you daily. Open reflection helps with knowing that I am never unaware of what my true intentions are in anything. Combining this with time stolen by rejection letters nobody knows you received, periods of life where I began to reject myself and kept it pushing. Remember that these periods are bars too, they may seem lower than you but in those moments they were bars set high. I overcame and overcome them by deciding to keep on trying, to get back up, to cut off some communication and identifying how to approach the bar next time.

I think about the times when those who loved me most feared that trials would lead me into depression, but what is depression when your hope and optimism constantly contradicts every trial your face. What is depression when suicide is never successful? Suicide where art thou voice and control that lingered at periods when I was fresh off baby formula. I am not immune to life but what I am is equipped. I am equipped with armor intended to provide some protection which includes - Jesus, remembering how I have overcome before, the good days, noticing small things, the songs of my childhood, where I could have been if it wasn't for Jesus Christ, hope and what I HAVE achieved.

A bar set high means I almost set myself up for my dream college but missed the scholarship deadline. I almost achieved a lot of things but missed the bus to those destinations. Here comes that word again *almost*. Life almost ended for me before my 9th birthday but I found poetry and educated myself on the spiritual repercussions of taking something I didn't give myself. LIFE.

I've applied for dreams that I don't think are a reflection of me now that I get the chance to think thoroughly about it. I took responsibility for my life way too young, so shared burdens aren't something I will grasp well. Why should I show my blood, my scars, and bruises to people who didn't cut me? Better yet people who can never understand me so will seek to simplify my experience to something more elementary. I feel things deeply so don't ever try to change that. I've seen shallow and trust me, it isn't tempting neither does it lift people over bars set high.

Life is more precious when you understand its substance and know how to measure the importance
of one moment to the next.

Life is more precious when you are interested in the small details when the small details matter. The bar set high is reaching for college when I wanted nothing to do with the institution. It is college program titles that go out of view in application windows. No brag all jokes. It's a search for the specialism that defines my path best, hoping it will lead to being a master of one or two.

Through it all, what kept my mind intact kept me together was nothing less than Jesus Christ himself the ultimate bar setter and overcomer. Just a reminder that my bar set high and overcome is a story for us all. My story isn't for me alone, pity me if you want but I don't live in my residence of bitterness any longer. Miss Pebble$ got upgraded to a new apartment building and I got a beautiful view too. Still asking my savior to hold my hand but I'm not doing it my way any longer, Holy Spirit take control you're the new homie now. Lord got every position from Board of Directors to senior business partner of this brand right here through to Master of Operations. I can't claim to live without first dying to the impossible move of trying to save myself. Trying to save, pick up and salvage my broken pieces that only remain because of Him.

The bar can only be reached completely. Completely means I salvage all my pieces and learn how to walk again. Go between celebrating myself more and calling myself out when I ought to try harder, do more and go beyond ordinary. Cry, get to the other side of confusion, seek clarity, shut nothing down that helps your growth. Know solitude, appreciate it, respect it and teach others to respect it. Move from no attainment because 'I can't do it' or because 'the weight seems too heavy to bear'. Nobody rewards you for selling yourself short, they will pick up all the gold coins when you give up too soon.

The bar doesn't lower itself when you give up. So why are you stopping before the mark. Why are you skipping classes if you want to level up? Attendance matters it just depends on what your attention is on.

The next hour is another opportunity, you have 60 reasons to breathe. Those breaths are a sign that life is still within - take every step on the ladder and don't miss a single one. You can reach that next bar but what is your attention on?

My attention was set on accountability. Accountability to myself, to those I am meant to help in this lifetime and to Him
who continually gives me life and life more abundantly.

   Copyright © 2019 PebblesWroteIt